So often you come across people online, chat with them and practically build up relationships with them. Then you meet them for real and it is so different. Or vice versa.
There is this character I met who joined our photographers' group one day. Now this gentleman was a fairly ordinary person. In fact, I'd go to the extent of calling him a wannabe. Fairly simple and uncomplicated. Then he added me on fb. So as is my wont, I checked out his profile and was surprised. This was nothing like the guy I had met in real life.
There was a batchmate of mine. Intelligent fellow, but a very affable one. Again, his online persona is so starkly different and elitist.
I have a theory-our online personas are all about how we want others to see us, while in real life we just can't avoid giving ourselves away. Of course, people try and do the same thing in three dimensions as well but there are some others who always catch up. On a slightly tangential note, could it also mean that our skills at identifying and stereotyping are underdeveloped as far as online profiles go? Or is it really far more difficult?
Sometimes people are really different from their online personas. I've felt this too. This one girl I know - she's so meek and almost unnoticeable, but when I talk to her online she's super-bitchy and almost over-confident. The contrast is strange!
ReplyDeleteAlso, it's interesting how people hook up online with people they've never met and have "relationships". It is almost as if the real life-showing off "I have a girlfriend" has now moved to the virtual domain! :)
ReplyDeletei agree with your theory.also probably(at the risk of sounding judgmental) most of the people have a distorted perspective about themselves.but it is quite interesting to see the obvious contrast:)
ReplyDeleteabout building relationships,have always wondered what is it about having random strangers as best buddies online! maybe the element of unpredictability..
And if you add their real personalities and their online selves together, you start getting a hint of who they really are and what kind of insecurities and fears drive them.
ReplyDeleteAs for random strangers as best buds, couldn't agree with you more :)
Very interesting. I wonder if the answer may be the other way around. In real time, in the real world, people may feel confined by their appearance, their voice, their mannerisms and so on. But online, with only words showing, their thoughts come to the fore, unadulterated. Which is our true self then? An amalgamation of both? Something in between? Very interesting indeed. But as far as I've known people, I havent really ever found a dramatic difference between someone's facebook profile and their real self. A wannabe comes across as a wannabe both times. Its just a lot more obvious on facebook. :D And vice versa for snobs.
ReplyDeleteOh and this also reminded me of something Martin Scorsese once said in an interview, he said, sitting on the subway in NY once he had this epiphany, looking around at the people in his compartment he realised we can never truly know people. He said he was shocked by the enormity of this idea. That we can never know anyone else in truth, becoz we only see a mix of our perception of a person and their representation of their self, which may be far different from what they're really like. He said it made him feel strangely isolated to realise how isolated each one of us really is.
ReplyDelete@TUIB
ReplyDeleteThat realisation...That very realisation. You've hit the nail on the head. :)